"!"
                       
 337 • Book Bossholes • 4/15/16
eddiots
I.T. Comics by eddieOttic
Bossholes
CODE
COMPLETE
CODE
NOT
COMPLETE
ezachOverflow
How many panels and how long to read each comic?
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeEddieOttic
This is 4 panels.
eddiots: 0:15
idiots: 0:25
managers: 0:05
helenWaite
You told us that managers were dumb. Why are they so fast?
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeEddieOttic
Because they only look at
the pictures.
Bossholes
"Bossholes" is about I.T. managers, the horrible things they do, the wonderful things they don't do, and the important things they never do.

If we programmers performed like our bosses, there'd be no software to manage. When we fail, everyone knows. When they fail, it's someone else's fault and life goes on (until it stops for good).

Bossholes don't grok people, tech, or domains but they love telling us what to do, whether or not it makes sense.

So why don't we workers hate our bossholes more? Why do we let them get away with corporate murder? For the same reason the poor don't hate the rich. We dream that we too can someday earn more to do less.
Buy BookBack to TopBuy Collection
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeEddieOttic
WOO HOO!
WOO HOO!
WOO HOO!
MISSIONSTATEMENTIf you'rereading this,you're the firstperson whoever did.ORG CHARTI'm the boss.You're not.OPEN DOORPOLICYlol lol lol lolneroFiddler
What the f*ck are you f*ckin yelling about, you f*cking nerd f*ckhead?
eddiots
 I.T. Manager Cuss Card
        Receive $100 for each Fword
0123 4567 89AB CDEF
EDDIE OTTIC   08/26
VISA
yogeshV
What do you think your dying wish
will be?
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeEddieOttic
Promotion into management.
kimPediment
That's so
stupid! Why?
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeEddieOttic
One less manager is better than
one less programmer.
Reviews
Wow! Now I know I'm not the only one who hates his boss!
★★★★★
Eddie nails it! But who's going to fix our bosshole problem?
★★★★★
Buy this book! You'll finally understand why it's so bad.
★★★★★
Excellent content! Crappy design. What else is new?
★★★★☆
Eddie is not kind and must report to HR for punishment.
★☆☆☆☆
Eddie's no longer with us. He's exploring new opportunities.
☆☆☆☆☆
Back to Top
MISSIONSTATEMENTIf you'rereading this,you're the firstperson whoever did.ORG CHARTI'm the boss.You're not.OPEN DOORPOLICYlol lol lol lolneroFiddler
The website's ugly because the wrong CSS got loaded.
conVicted
I'm sick of I.T. gobblygook. Speak English!
MISSIONSTATEMENTIf you'rereading this,you're the firstperson whoever did.ORG CHARTI'm the boss.You're not.OPEN DOORPOLICYlol lol lol lolneroFiddler

OK
conVicted
There you go again! What does "OK"
stand for?
About Eddiots
This is a work of fiction inspired by real events I witnessed, endured, or instigated.

Every character and company is a composite of real people and places from my work life. I just changed the names to protect the incompetent.

Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or businesses, active or bankrupt, is either coincidental or unavoidable because these eddiots are everywhere!

Thanks to all you bossholes, players, liars, fakers, slackers, posers, jerks, cheaters, and producers of endless technical debt. I used to hate you but now I love you because I need no imagination. I just share forward the suffering you shared with me.

Buy BookBack to TopBuy Collection
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeeEddieOttic
Our managers suck! How'd you ever get where you are now?
MISSIONSTATEMENTIf you'rereading this,you're the firstperson whoever did.ORG CHARTI'm the boss.You're not.OPEN DOORPOLICYlol lol lol lolneroFiddler
Because my father died.
queenOfHR
Because my mother died.
conVicted
Because my victim died.
Eddie Ottic has written 2 million lines of code for 94 firms in 50 years. There's a good chance something you own was built with his software.

He loves coding but hates going to work. Everywhere he's ever been had sufficient tech. None had sufficient management but plenty of bossholes.

When he says this, he's "not a team player". But when his comics say the same thing, others listen, laugh, and learn the inside truths no one else teaches. That's why he built eddiots.

He's a fair writer, a lousy artist, and a lazy developer. But combining them makes the magic vector art about his long I.T. incarceration. Read it, learn something, and most of all, have fun!

Buy BookBack to TopBuy Collection
MISSIONSTATEMENTIf you'rereading this,you're the firstperson whoever did.ORG CHARTI'm the boss.You're not.OPEN DOORPOLICYlol lol lol lolneroFiddler
Dunning's out for 6 weeks with a hunting injury.
CLOSED TICKETSadd Std Costadd Box IDsadd WIP Reportadd AWS APIadd XML feedadd Dropdownadd colorsOPEN TICKETSfix Std Costfix Box IDsfix WIP Reportfix AWS APIfix XML feedfix Dropdownfix colorspaulaNomial
He was dressed properly but it started to rain.
CoffeeTeaAdderallgaryRiggBREAKROOM
So he covered himself with a shopping bag
to keep dry.
Table of Contents
12 Cheaper  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
7
12 Consultants  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
8
25th Anniversary  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
9
2 Worst Sites  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
10
3 Toasts  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
11
6 More Mgrs  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
12
9 New Managers  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
13
AI Came  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
14
AS  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
15
Acquisition  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
16
Acronyms  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
17
All MB As  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
18
Almost Believe  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
19
Always Truth  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
20
App Wont Work  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
21
Art Of Management  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
22
Average Bonus  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
23
Bad Touches  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
24
Banned  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
25
Best Manager  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
26
Better Better  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
27
Biggest Customer  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
28
Binge Read  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
29
Binge Watching  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
30
Blackmail Gay  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
31
Blind Dev  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
32
Boss Drinking  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
33
Boss Help You  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
34
Boss Training  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
35
Bossamorphosis  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
36
Brazen Mgmt  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
37
Build Or Buy  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
38
CEO Bot  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
39
CEO On Live  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
40
Cafeteria  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
41
Call Center  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
42
Camber  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
43
Cant Keep  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
44
Cause Effect  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
45
Cheap Cheap Cheap  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
46
Cheerleading  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
47
Code Or Specs  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
48
Coding Managers  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
49
Comic Metrics  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
50
Communicate  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
51
Complains  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
52
Conditions  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
53
Contributor  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
54
Corvette Mud  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
55
Cuss Card  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
56
Back to Top
Table of Contents
Cut In Pay  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
57
Cyber Bully  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
58
Damn Shame  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
59
Dartboards  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
60
Days Of Good  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
61
Dead Tech  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
62
Decision Maker  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
63
Deploy Bugs  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
64
Dev Budgets  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
65
Dev Revenge  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
66
Devs Place  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
67
Dont Know What  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
68
Dunnings Pick  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
69
Dying Wish  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
70
Eddies Award  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
71
Eff Imm  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
72
Execution  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
73
Executive Talk  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
74
For My Team  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
75
Formal Process  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
76
Fridays Off  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
77
Gobblygook  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
78
Google Me  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
79
Great Answer  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
80
Great Concepts  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
81
Great Software  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
82
Green Bay  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
83
Hiring Freeze  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
84
Hit Man  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
85
Houston Bunker  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
86
Howd You Get Here  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
87
Hunting Injury  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
88
I Can Hear  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
89
ITA  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
90
IT Genie 1 Of 2  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
91
IT Genie 2 Of 2  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
92
IT Retreat  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
93
Indispensible  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
94
It Was Like That  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
95
Javascript Class  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
96
Jury Duty  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
97
KL Is  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
98
KP Is Way Up  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
99
Key West  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
100
Last 3 CI Os  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
101
Love My Book  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
102
Lunch And Learn  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
103
Lunch Review  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
104
Manager Doer  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
105
Manager Talk  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
106
Back to Top
Table of Contents
Managerese  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
107
Mayor Voted Out  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
108
Mayview  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
109
Meta Captcha  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
110
Mgmt Strategies  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
111
Micromanager  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
112
Migration  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
113
Mindfulness  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
114
Mob Bosshole  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
115
More Or Less  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
116
More Profit  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
117
More Questions  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
118
Need Rent  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
119
Nero Arrives  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
120
Nero At Lunch  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
121
Never Listens  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
122
New CIO Intro  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
123
New Director  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
124
New Faces  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
125
New Furniture  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
126
New Offices  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
127
Nice Boss  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
128
No Better  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
129
No Compliment  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
130
No Heat  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
131
Nonbinaries  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
132
Not A Good Idea  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
133
Not April Fools  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
134
Nut Holding  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
135
Office Chair  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
136
Office Chairs  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
137
Old Boss New Boss  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
138
Only 30 Minutes  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
139
Only WFH  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
140
Open Window  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
141
Out Of Business  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
142
Pig 4 Broke It  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
143
Pithy Answers  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
144
Plan A Or Plan B  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
145
Poison  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
146
Post Office IT  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
147
Powderball  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
148
Protect Himself  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
149
Quote Eisenhower  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
150
Quote FDR  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
151
ROI Class  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
152
Recent Failure  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
153
Replace Managers  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
154
Right Lunch  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
155
Someday  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
156
Back to Top
Table of Contents
Sorry Bout That  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
157
Special Bonus  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
158
Start Stop Continue  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
159
Stop Bugs  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
160
Strategy  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
161
Survival Guide  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
162
Throw In The Towel  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
163
Transform 3   . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
164
Transform 4   . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
165
Tried Before  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
166
Trouble Sleeping  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
167
Unencrypted  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
168
Wall To Wall  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
169
Wednesday  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
170
Were Going Broke  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
171
Were Off  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
172
What Could Go  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
173
What They Think  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
174
What To Eat  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
175
What Why How  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
176
Whats Wrong  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
177
Whineries  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
178
White House  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
179
Who Gives Work  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
180
Who Made You  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
181
Why Bad Bosses  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
182
Why They Hate IT  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
183
With That Boss  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
184
Work Boss Hard  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
186
Work Chronicles  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
187
Work From Home  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
188
You Bought It  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  
189
Back to Top
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeEddieOttic
Woo hoo! Two months off work! Jury duty! A murder case!
CallInUser1
He strangled his boss.
Can you be objective?
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeEddieOttic
Innocent! Innocent! Innocent!
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeeEddieOttic

Oops
Stop! Don't buy this book! It's an embarassment to righteous hardworking bossholes like me!
eddiots.com
Don't listen to Con. Proceeds from the sale of this book go to his campaign for parole.
eddiots.com
Back to Top
BUY $5
Price Increase
on Day 837283
kimPediment
I heard we're getting new office chairs.
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeEddieOttic
Yea. I just got mine today.
alGorithm
So how does it make your
ass feel?
AGILE
SUCKS
NOT ATEAMPLAYERBADEDDIETUDEeEddieOttic
I don't know. Nero's in Cleveland.

eddiots Comic Books!
eddiots
by eddieOttic
NOHELLNOAGILEPLANNINGBOARDJANFEBMARAPRMAYJUNJULAUGOCTNOVDECYOU WANT IT WHEN?LOL LOL LOL LOL2025  2026  2027  2028WHERE'STHE STORYASK THEPRODUCTOWNERNEXTSPRINTSEP
Agiletated
eddiots
by eddieOttic
Bondage
eddiots
by eddieOttic
Bossholes
eddiots
by eddieOttic
 OVERHEAD
 I.T. DEPT
COST $5M.
With 1 Manager  $ 20M.
With 2 Managers   60M.
With 3 Managers 140M.
With 4 Managers 170M.
With CIO $200M
Busimess
eddiots
by eddieOttic
Code Nuts
eddiots
by eddieOttic
 
eddietude
eddiots
by eddieOttic
Eddieficial
Intelligence
eddiots
by eddieOttic
$100   $100   $100  $100$200   $200   $200  $200$300   $300   $300  $300$400   $400   $400  $400
SUPPLY
CHAIN
NO
BUGS
BIG
DATA
DOG
FOOD
Favorites
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by eddieOttic
Git a
Job!
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Haz Math
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Low Tech
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Manajerks
eddiots
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Scrumbells
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Slackers
eddiots
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Crap-for-Less
Employee Trivia Game
Compete for Fun and Prizes!
1st Place: $100
2nd Place: $50
3rd Place: $25
30 second time limit per question
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Stories
eddiots
by eddieOttic
Tiny Tales


Temp Offer Expires at the Singularity!
Get all 16 Comic Books
for $39!
(reg $5 ea)
Tap on a Book
To see Inside
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MAKEUP
SHOES
STUFF
CLOTHES
COFFEE
OPRAH
ebettyOttic
Hey brainiacs! Don't forget my Eddie's first puzzle book!
LSOBSHESO
My variable names suck!
Help me be a team player!
Descrumble My Variables
What's the surprise answer?
200 NEW Puzzles
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eddieOttic
Comic Engineer
contact: eddiots at gmail

Eddie's Favorite Comics
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