eddiots.com/1

Welcome! • NEW COMIC 7/18/23

WATERFALL

BLOWS

LESS

THAN

AGILE

SUCKS

I'm a comic engineer. I love coding but hate going to work.

I built eddiots for us to laugh about it. Let the bossholes cry.

I'm tech lead and Eddie's best friend.
I hate my boss.

One more useless meeting and I'll kick him right in his low hanging fruit!

I've been here the longest and wrote lots of legacy stuff.

I hate working on other dev's crap. Oh wait...
I wrote this.

I'm totally burnt out and the 2nd laziest dev (after Eddie).

I only have two
career goals:
Direct.
And Deposit.

I'm a brilliant introvert who's written the best software ever.

I'll show it to you as soon as it's done.
(in 2039)

I was Top of my Class. Naturally, they put me on Help Desk.

I'm still here 3 years later, so pardon me for my eddietude.

I started as an offshore intern but now I'm
in-house.

I love the tech but still don't understand the peopology.

CODE
COMPLETE

CODE
NOT
COMPLETE

I may be the youngest dev but I have lots of experience.

Three CS degrees and 27 failed startups.

I'm the admin who keeps everything running well.

If you need anything from I.T., just come to Helen Waite.

I'm the I.T. manager but I don't have imposter syndrome.

It's not a syndrome if
you really are an imposter.

Bet
on
Bears

Get
More
Coffee

Delete
all
Texts

PIN
is
1234

Fart
into
Mic

Bring
some
Donuts

Yesterday I was a scrum master. Today I am a scrum master.

I have no impediments because I don't do anything.

As CIO, I'm mindful of KPI metrics for results oriented deep pockets

with attention to detail on low hanging fruit for digital transformation.

As CEO, I'm worth $10 million and I'm the big boss!

Ever since my father gave me this job and $20 million.

URGENT! 10/21/2014

Hire 26 designer admins
2015 Software Budgets
Implement more idiocy

I was VP at an acquisition, so now I'm an I.T. director here.

I.T. managers do nothing.
I.T. directors do twice as much.

I'm a designer. These colors suck because Eddie won't listen to me.

I'm an I.T.
consultant.
That just cost you $8,000.

I.T. may play the games,
but HR makes the rules.

I'm a recruiter. I find everyone a new job every 91 days.

I'm a front-end engineer. I need Adderall to get up for work.

I'm a back-end engineer. I need Valium to get down for work.

If anyone ever makes bugs, I get the blame.

I'm a business analyst. Slow, crappy, or expensive? Choose two.

I'm a product owner. I have no idea what that means.

I'm a sys admin. I just have to fix one thing. Oops! ^#& ds #& q7f.

MAKEUP

SHOES

STUFF

CLOTHES

COFFEE

OPRAH

I'm Eddie's mother. Buy a book so he can finally move out of my She Shed.

You mean my Man Cave. Nine years of college for this?

27 2r 3c 47 98 Ac Al As Bs Br Bc Cf Cp Cn Cc Cw Da Dc Dn Da Ly Eb Ep Ef Fn Fq Fc Tk Go Gf Hr Hc Hl Hd Hi Ig Tm I Y Iz In Ei Jf Jd Lq Lm Bb Ll Mh Mp Mu Lb Nh Nw Nr Nm Ed Ns Ns Oc Ow O P Pv Pw Ps Qq Ns R Re Rp Rs Rt Rc Nn Ss Se Sf Sp Sm Sr Sp Sw Tm Ts Tr T2 T Ug Ur V Vg Bg Wh Ws Yd old new alpha

eddie's
favorites

EDDIOTS REPORT

SIMPLE GOALS
ARE BETTER

The Ticket is the Bible

Primary Measure of Agile Progress

The Problem with Overtime

Danger of Unclear Specs

Compete for Fun and Prizes!

1st Place: $100

2nd Place: $50

3rd Place: $25

30 second time limit per question

Join Game

eddiots Comic Books!

by eddieOttic

Agiletated

by eddieOttic

Bondage

COST $5M.
With 1 Manager $ 20M.
With 2 Managers 60M.
With 3 Managers 140M.
With 4 Managers 170M.
With CIO $200M

Eddieficial
Intelligence

Compete for Fun and Prizes!

1st Place: $100

2nd Place: $50

3rd Place: $25

30 second time limit per question

Temp Offer Expires at the Singularity!

Get all 16 Comic Books
for $39!

(reg $5 ea)

Tap on a Book

To see Inside

Agiletated Bondage Bossholes Busimess Code Nuts eddietude EI Favorites Git a Job Haz Math Low Tech Manajerks Scrumbells Slackers Stories Tiny Tales

BUY
NOW

$80

$39

MAKEUP

SHOES

STUFF

CLOTHES

COFFEE

OPRAH

Hey brainiacs! Don't forget my Eddie's first puzzle book!

My variable names suck!

Help me be a team player!

Descrumble My Variables

What's the surprise answer?

200 NEW Puzzles

Scrumbles

for

eddieOttic

Back to Top
eddieOttic
Comic Engineer
contact: eddiots at gmail

Eddie's Favorite Comics
Loading Artist • Work Chronicles • They Can Talk • xkcd • Cyanide and Happiness • Pizza Cake

This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 2.5 License.